I am currently writing this blog post a few days out from my first official solo adventure. And, I am not writing it from the perspective of someone who is single and/or traveling ‘solo’ to join a group experience. Don’t get me wrong – I have a special place in my heart for group travel as that is a large part of what I do with my company Wild Hive. And, I SO admire every woman who comes on her own…it takes a lot of vulnerability to make that decision.
However, I am writing this as a partner and a mom to three kids – yet, I have made the decision to take myself on an adventure of my own. That’s right – no one else in tow. One glorious week all to myself. Most of my friends seem to embrace this decision, whether they are being honest with me or not! Although, I’d like to think that I surround myself with incredibly thoughtful, supportive people. There are plenty of others who think it’s extremely odd that I am traveling on my own. My kids included 😉 So, I’d like to take some time to discuss solo travel redefined, from the perspective of a woman / mom / wife, etc. who is making the conscious decision to venture into the unknown – alone!
Making the decision to travel alone…
Travel is obviously a significant part of my life. Although, I have only traveled with my husband, my family, my friends and when I guide my retreats for women. I did work at a women’s conference two years in a row – I stayed in my own hotel room, but was mostly surrounded by other people. I’ve had a few travel experiences where I’ve been on my own for dinners or sightseeing, but it’s usually just a day or two here and there.
When I returned from my most recent Wild Hive trip to Panama, I began going through an interesting journey – most likely it started a while ago on a subconscious level, yet this past Wild Hive experience really catapulted me into quite the disintegration. In this process, I am proudly and courageously navigating how I define me…separate from all of my other roles. I know, wholeheartedly, that travel is part of my mind, body and soul connection. I find it an invaluable source of inspiration, creativity, time to reflect, make new connections – the list goes on. So, I decided that I would tell my family that I making it a priority to take myself on a little adventure, solo, at least a few times a year, perhaps more. Who knows! This chapter is all about embracing the uncertainty and reclaiming more of myself.
Living through action…
I chose the destination of my first solo trip based on the location where I will be holding a future Wild Hive trip. So, that was easy as I had already started to make connections there. I will spend time meeting up with those people and scouting places before I bring a group of 20 women along! Yet, my intention for the week is to spend time with myself. To read, to write, to relax, to go inward. Without the stimulation that I so often crave / distract myself with at home.
In regard to my kids, whom have expressed that they think this is a strange decision (well, they should be used to that by now as I don’t live much of my life by traditional conventions!), and of course, they are likely a little nervous about my safety as I am traveling internationally. For me, parenting is modeled through my actions, even more so than my words. I am proud that I have lived motherhood, even though it’s the most challenging job I’ve ever had, by showing my kids how to do hard things and live outside of our comfort zones. I hope that I have given them an example of how to live chasing after your wildest dreams. I know they respect my choices and my life’s passions. They’ve watched me prioritize filling up my own cup. And, go from a wounded feminine, to something much more empowered. I haven’t even had that privilege with my own mom. They are watching me stretch and grow, try new things and learn A LOT. The greatest gift of all would be leaving behind a legacy that instills more adventure, curiosity, play and life into each of their futures.
The anticipation of solo travel…
Of course I am nervous. I am usually a bit anxious before any trip – which is interesting considering how passionate I am about travel. However, it’s the unknown / the uncertainty of it all. Both exciting AND scary at the same time. And, that is ok. This is life! It’s a practice in showing yourself grace and knowing that you can do hard things. Oftentimes we are surprised by our own fortitude, if we give ourselves the chance! And, better yet – we are never the same for it.
So, I’ve set boundaries. I know that I will go to early dinners. Have a tremendous sense of awareness. I have left phone numbers and contacts with friends and family so they know who I have been socializing with.
Mostly I come back to the reason why I am traveling alone. To get to know myself better, in this chapter of my life. To get away from the hustle and bustle, the over commitments and noise. I will have space alone to put energy into all I still want to accomplish during what is remaining of my human experience. I want to live in color, have more life, more adventure, live expansively – and, to me that means immersing myself in another culture, making new friends, learning new skills! I have no doubt that it will make me a better person, friend / mom / partner. I want to live with intention and purpose. And, in that journey – I think time for self reflection is essential.
So, what about you?
Most of the women (moms / spouses) I have told have expressed similar sentiments. An excitement about a yearning they’ve been feeling to do something similar. They just haven’t expressed it yet to their people. Or, they haven’t harnessed the little spark of courage it takes to make it happen. Perhaps this will inspire them.
You do not need to go far. Find sacred, comfy space to take up your space…at the end of the day, it’s about stretching ourselves. Doing things we didn’t think we could! Inviting ourselves to spend more time going inward to connect to our bodies and desires. Time is flying by. I don’t know about you, but I want to live authentically and learn what that means to me – as it continues to evolve over the course of my life! I want to know and heal myself so that I can show up so much more profoundly for everyone around me.
So, whether you’re single, in a relationship, responsible for children / fur babies – get out there. Don’t hold yourself back. Take the time. It’s not selfish. It’s actually the greatest gift for everyone around you. Go all in.
Stay tuned for more to come after I return!